A plane crashes right at the US-Canada border line, which countries will the people bury the survivors?
They won't bury the survivors!

If there are 3 apples (that aren't yours) and you took 2 away, how many would you have?
2, because you took two!

Some months have 31 days, how many months have 28 days?
They all have 28 days!

There are 8 sailors, 57 passengers, 73 baggages, 15 waiters/waitress and 4 cooks in your ship.  Do you know how old is the captain?
The captain is you so your age will be the answer!

There are 10 people taking an elevator to the top floor (40th floor) of a building.  When the elevator reaches up to the top floor (the doors of the elevator aren't opened, everyone is still in the elevator), the elevator wires break apart and the elevator goes down to the first floor immediately (with a BIG crash!).  When the cops arrived, they found out that no one was injured.  Why is that?
They all died so no one was injured!

It usually takes Jamie 1 hour to walk from the head of a train to the end of it.  But for some reason, today it took him a lot shorter! He walked with the same pace.  The train isn't moving. Why is that?
Don't know how to explain!

Uncle Bill has 9 sons.  Each sons have a younger sister.  How many daughters do he have?
He has only 1 daughter, being she is the youngest of the whole family!

If it takes 10 minutes to boil 1 egg, how many minutes will it take to boil 3?
10 minutes!0

Can you find three errors:
Their are three errers in this paragraph.  Study it carefully and see if you can find them all.
1st error: THEIR is spelled THERE in this case!
2nd error: ERRERS is spelled wrong!  It is spelled like this: ERRORS
3rd error:  There are only TWO errors not THREE!

There are 10 fishes in the pond and one of them died today.  How many are left now?
10, because the dead fish is not going to disappear!

A hunter saw 10 birds on a tree, and he shot one of the birds down.  How many birds are left on the tree?
They all flew away of course!

A frog is in a big box that is 3 metres high.  The frog could jump 60cm high.  How many times does the frog have to jump in order to get out of the 3-metre box?
The frog can never escape from the box because it can only jump 60cm high.  After one jump, it then goes back down to the bottom because of gravity!

One day Jamie goes to the park with his parent.  When they arrived to the park, his parent lit up a cigarrette and starts smoking, and Jamie goes to the swings and starts playing.  After a while, they start walking home, and then saw a friend.  His friend want to say something but Jamie interupped, "This person's not my dad, I told you!"  and Jamie did not lie.  Why?
Cause that adult is his mother!

How can two oranges be shared among three boys equally?
Make them into 3 glasses of orange juice with the same mass!

Which clock is more accurate: a clock that is one minute faster than the real time or a clock that have stopped and why?
The clock that have stopped, because the clock that is a minute faster will always be a minute faster but the clock that have stopped will be correct at the time it stopped.  Say the clock stopped at 12:00, and then the real time might be also 12:00, but the other clock will be 12:01!

Why did the cuckoo called 13 times in a cuckoo clock when it was only 12 o'clock?
Cause it needed to be repaired as soon as possible!

A movie in a cinema starts at 2:30pm and Jody got a ticket for it.  Jody stared at her watch and it says 12:30pm, so that means she still have 2 hours left until the movie started.  She called a friend and they both met at a restaurant for lunch for an hour.  After she went shopping and after a while she checked the time again.  It was 2:10pm.  She knew she will have enough time but she thought, 'Oh well, I'll wait until the movie starts anyway!".  She drove for 10 minutes and arrive at the cinema at exactly 2:25pm.  But the movie has already started!  Why is that?
The watch was at a wrong time!

2 fathers and 2 sons went hunting for hares in a forest.  After one hour  they each got one, but why did they only have 3 hares?
There were only 3 people.  The father's son has a son himself, so the father is also a son.  In other words, the "grandpa", "father" and "son" (and the "father" is the father of the "son" and son of the "grandpa").

How many times can you take 5 from 25?
Once, then you'll be taking 5 from 20!

Each side of his house faces south. Where does he live?
North Pole...

How can you make eleven sticks ( | | | | | | | | | | | ) into nine without any math (no adding/subtracting/multiplying/dividing, NO MATH)?
Connect the lines so it spells N I N E.

An old man lives on the 15/F of an apartment.  When he goes out he goes to G/F, but when he comes back he goes to 10/F, and then take the stairs to 15/F.  He takes the same elevator.  How come?
He's too short to reach the 15/F button.

A dog is tied to leash, or something like a rope, which is 5m long, but it is able to run to a bone lying 10m away.  The leash does not break apart or streched.  How come?
The other side of the leash is free (not tied around to anything)!

What livings thing has 4 legs when it is young, 2 legs when it is older, and 3 legs when it is old?
Humans!  When humans are babies, they crawl, so they have 4 legs.  When they get older they walk with two legs.  As they get older, they need a cane to help them walk.

There is a lamp and a candle in the dark room. What should you light first?
A match.

You have just arrived from a small town and wanted to get a haircut.  You asked a young boy where the barbershop(s) is/are located.  The boy said, "There are only 2 barbershops in this small town, one is a block ahead and the other is near that museum over there."  You went to the barbershop near the museum and saw a messy barber that hasn't shaved for a long time, and hair was all around the floor.  You went to the other barbershop and peek through the window, seeing a cleanly shaved barber and the place was also very clean.  Why did you go back to the other barbershop?
There's only 2 barbershops in this town.  If the barber one block ahead is cleanly shaved, then he must have gone to the other messy barbershop for a haircut!

Put only one straight line to make this statement true (not changing the equal sign to an unequal sign): 5 + 5 + 5 = 550
Put a diagonal line / to the first + sign and the statement will be true: 545 + 5 = 550

Why are 1966 pennies worth almost twenty dollars?
1966 pennies equals $19.66, which is worth almost $20.00.

A farmer ownes 4 pink pigs, 1 brown pigs and 4 black pigs. How many of the pigs can say that it is the same color as another pig in the farm?
None, because pigs can't talk!

Tommy and Casey found a long tube.  It is big enough so that each kid can crawl in from one end to another.  If both kids go into the tube from opposite ends, can they crawl the whole length of the tube and come out the other end?
Say Tommy and Casey are at opposite ends (Tommy at the right, Casey at the left).  Let Tommy crawl through the tube first, and after he climb the entire length, he will be at the left side with Casey.  Then Casey crawls the entire tube.  Then they will be in the opposite ends.

A rope was cut once but after that cut, it is still 1 whole rope (which means only one piece, not 2 pieces).  How come?
The rope was circle "O", after that cut, so it is still one piece of rope.

One person's face is facing north, and the other person is facing south.  Without turning their heads, can they face each other?
Yes, because they are already facing each other...

An old man was walking down the sidewalks.  Then suddenly it started raining.  That old man didn't bring an umbrella, and he doesn't have a hat, and he didn't even bring his raincoat with him, and he didn't look for covers, but the rain didn't wet his hair.  Why is that?
The old man is bald (has no hair)!

I don't have any siblings.  That guy's father is my father's son.  Who is that guy?
That guy is me!

A man want to cross a bridge without paying to the guard who sleeps at the middle of the bridge.  The guard wakes up every 3 minutes, and it is impossible to cross the bridge before he wakes up.  If the guard sees people crossing the bridge without paying, he will send them back.  How can the man cross the bridge without paying?
Before the guard wakes up, pretend you are going to the side that you were and then when the guard sees you he then sends you back to the other side (where you want to go)...because the guard thought you came from the other side to go to this side.

A little boy likes to fool around with people.  One day he went to a pig butcher and said "I want something not fat, not lean, with no bones, and with no meat!"  The butcher knows immediately what the little boy wants.  Do you know what he wants?
Pig's blood....

There are two bridges: one is large and tall, the other one is short and small.  The small bridge is flooded once, but the large bridge is flooded twice.  Do you know why?
First, the water flooded both the large and small bridge, then the water goes down halfway so the taller bridge isn't flooded anymore, but the shorter one is still flooded.  Then the water goes back up, so the large bridge is flooded the second time.  Then the water goes back down.

One cat can catch a mouse in 5 minutes.  How many cats can catch 100 mice in 100 minutes?
5 cats.  One cat can catch 20 mice in 100 minutes, so 5 cats can catch 100 mice in 100 minutes.

Mary weighs 39 pounds, and she has to bring two metal balls across a small bridge.  Each metal ball weighs 1 pound.  The bridge can only hold weight up to 40 pounds.  How can Mary bring the two metal balls with her at the same time and cross the bridge without the bridge breaking apart?
While going across, toss one of the metal balls up high and when it comes back down, throw the other one and catches the one that comes back down.  Continue to do this until she reaches the other side.

Without bouncing a ball off anything, hit it with anything, or tie anything to it, can you throw it so it goes a distance, stops, reverses its motion and goes the opposite way?
Yes, throw it up.

How many circles/squares are there?  Which has more?

There are 11 squares and 9 circles.  There are more squares than circles.  Top left corner is an example: the two big squares were overlapping, so the little square is counted another square
 

Family "A", "B", and "C" are enemies to each other.  They have to go to the other side which the gates are located.  "A" family goes to "A" gate, B goes to B, C goes to C, without meeting each other on the way.  How?

A question for ICQ people:
Jacqueline always plays on the ICQ.  She has the ICQ for about 1 year.  She went on it almost daily.  One day, when she went on, she saw ALL the people in her list online!!  Do you think it is possible?
Yes, it is possible to have everyone in your list online.  Jacqueline only has 20 people, and those people always goes online like Jacqueline ^_^....

A man was digging his backyard to see if there were ancient remains.  He found a box, and inside the box there were few coins.  They say 58 BC.  He thought to himself, "Oh my gosh!  These coins are ancient, and I'll be rich if I sell them to the museums!!"  He showed them to a friend, but the friend knows immediately that they were fake.  Do you know why?
How did those people from 58 BC know that there is BC if they don't know there will be an AD.  (In case you don't know: BC[before Christ] = BCE[Before the common era], AD[anno Domini] = CE[common era])

How can penguins survive in the Arctic?
Penguins don't live in the Arctic (North Pole), they live in the Antarctic (South Pole).

The sidewalks were very quiet; there were only few people on the sidewalks.  There were no cars on the roads.  The streetlights were all off and the moon is covered by the clouds.  An old man was walking on the silent sidewalks, and then he dropped a coin on the ground.  He knew exactly where the coin is.  Why?
It was an early sunny morning, so no streetlights were on, you couldn't really see the moon and many people are still sleeping at this time so the sidewalks and roads are still quiet.  The old man isn't blind so he knows where the coin is when he dropped it.

A man was killed in 1958 and buried in 1957.  Why?
The man was killed in late Demeber 1958 BC (BCE), and was buried few days after his death in 1957 BC (BCE) of early January.

There are 5 passengers on the bus.  At the first station, 2 passengers came off.  At the second station, 3 passengers came on.  At the third station, 4 passengers came on.  How many people are in the bus up to this point?
There are 11 people in the bus, remember the bus driver is also in the bus..........

There are 5 passengers on the bus.  At the first station, 2 passengers came on, and then at the second station 3 passengers came off.  How many passengers were in the bus?
There are 5 passengers because I asked "How many passengers WERE in the bus?".........

One person knows it, two person doesn't know it, three person doesn't know it.  What is it?
Fart....^__________________^

Use any operations (plus, minus, multiply, divide) so that eight 8's (88888888) equals 1000.
888+88+8+8=1000

There are 26 letters in the alphabet.   ET goes home and only 21 letters were left.  Do you know why?
ET goes home on UFO....

How can you drop an egg on a concrete floor without breaking it?
The concrete floor will not break because an egg was dropped on it!

There is a hole on both of my socks I just bought today?  Why?
It's weird to have no holes on your socks....how can you ever wear one without having one hole on your sock?

A healthy wife married a healthy husband and gave birth to a baby that has only one left hand!  Is the baby healthy?
Everyone has 1 left hand!  It's weird to have two of them!

A guard dog is in front of his master's mansion.  Every time it sees someone walking past it, it will bark for 30 minutes.  How many people (minimum) have to walk past it so it bark for 6 hours unstopped?
One person....just keep walking....

A policeman saw a truck driver going the wrong way down a one-way street, but didn't give him a ticket. Why not?
The truck driver was walking.

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