This is Katy.   She's a secret agent.   Her eyes aren't really red, unless it's  a full moon.   We have a love child named Donald, but since I've been at school, she's been taking care of him.  She doesn't mind though.  Katy is cool, but you must realize that everything we do together sucks.  Want an example?  Well, we went to a movie once and I broke the armrest on accident.  Also, Katy bragged to me about how she had gotten this guy to give her his watch. The next time we go to a movie, that kid she got the watch from comes in and sits next to us!  So I say "Katy, what TIME is it."  Then the kid confronts us and we just diss him.  Another time, we went to the mall and two kids started asking me for the money I owed them.  Katy is always getting me in trouble.  But she has a cat named MuMu and a french dog, so that's cool.  Oh, and one time we went to Perkins and a serial killer guy started theatening us and that sucked!  And one time at Jerry's a guy came up to us and started preaching and it was soooo messed up.  Obviously, I love Katy or else i wouldn't put up with all the crap that happens when we hang out.   
 
 
 

He's gonna kill me for using this picture, but I couldn't resist.  This is Eller.  No first name, just ELLER.  Actually, this is 9th grade Eller.   I don't even know where to begin.   Eller is a really cool guy.  He likes hockey, anime, music, Canadians, bagels, North Carolina, and Asian girls.  One time me and Eller ate a box of doughnuts that were bad.  That sucked.  We used to hang out in 1st grade, but then we went to different schools until 9th grade.   Then it was just like old times...stick balancing, gee-tar tabs, and messing with Dr. Byrne's mind.   Don't hold it against him, but Eller is color blind, which, although he claims otherwise, means he can ONLY see in black and white.  Eller was the mastermind behind Blue Jacket, bringing me, Graham, Calvin, and Damon into the greatest cover band that never was.  But, man, could Damon belt out those Weezer and Alice in Chains songs.  Eller also has a far superior web site...check out the links page.

Well, here's my friend Heather along with her friends the European Pimps.  I just met Heather last year.  She is really funny.  She just got her entire body pierced...her eyebrow, tongue, bellybutton, and...uh...lots more.  She has a habit of giving her phone number to gang members.  And she is funny when she's mad.  Those guys with her we met after senior prom.  God, I wanted to punch both of 'em.  One was from Italy, the other from Sweden I think.  I was trying to leave when they stopped Rachel and Heather and started talking to them.  God, we must've been there for half an hour!  AND THEY CALLED ME 90210 BOY!!!!   The redhead guy actually said "Chill out Dee - lan."  My friends had to explain that he was referring to Luke Perry.  They were pretty funny though.  I just wanted to leave!
 
 

Well, here's Mary with Sweden Boy.  They were such a cute couple.  Mary is a great gal.  She puts up with ALL my jokes about her height, but I just do it because there's nothing else about her I could make fun of.  The best thing about Mary is that it's so easy to make her laugh.  It's especially fun when Rachel's there cause she's the same way.  Mary is obsessed with Keanu Reeves.  What's up with that?  Mary has had jobs with Einstien Bagels, K-Mart, some doctor's office, and now somewhere else I think.  One time at K-Mart she got an old lady stealing vitamins and then she chased her and the lady tripped over all the plants.  She tells the story much better, though.
 

Coming Someday: Friends part 3
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