Always Watching YouAct 2: Silent Observations/Endymion
by: Sailor Jes
email: Sailor jes@aol.com
13/4                    Act 2: Silent Observations/Endymion
                            by: Sailor Jes
WOWIE!!!  To all those that wrote me with your compliments:  Thanks a
million!!  I didn't expect such a warm response.  But, unfortunately I
didn't get very much constuctive critism.  I'm very open to suggestions and
would appreciate some.  I won't bite (hard!!!  <-Austin Powers!) Anyways,
here's the much-awaited second chapter in my lovely little fic.
The same disclaimer applies.  Sailor Moon does not belong to me
(unfortunately) but this fanfic does so if you're going to use it anywhere,
please ask my permission first.
Once again, the asterik (*) implies a comment by yours truly that can be
found at the end of the story.Love ya and bai!-JessiSailor jes@aol.com
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Nine...Ten...Eleven...
I wait for the last chime of the clock before opening the door to the
blacony, just to be sure.And...Twelve.
Slowly, I turn the handle and push the french door ajar.  The warm breath
of the night air caresses my face and I step out onto the balcony that
encirlcles the second floor of the entire palace.  One of the first things
I notice is a full, white moon high in the starry sky.  It casts
mysterious, heavenly shadows on the marble stone columns making the night
seem ethereal. 
Looking right and left, I check for any signs of another person.  It's not
that I'm forbidden to be out here, after all I am the Prince of Earth and
can do basically anything I want, but I don't want the company.  This is
the one time when I get to be alone in my garden and I like to enjoy it.
A few times, when I let my gaurd down, I was caught by Princess Beryl, who
insisted she come with me.  Even though she tries to hide it, I know she's
madly in love with me.  I don't exactly hate her, she's a great girl, but
she can be so bossy and annoying...and boring, not exactly marriage
material, although I know the entire kingdom would love to have me marry
her (or anyone for that matter.) They desperatly want to see us together at
my birthday celebration.  I make a sour face.  I'm dreading the stupid
ball.  Every year I become more and more pressured to announce an
engagement at those parties.  My parents are inviting almost every worthy
princess from every kingdom on the globe, same insipid tag-alongs as lastyear.
Thinking these things as I approach the stairs into the Garden make me
shudder.  Marriage without love is like a night with no stars, empty,
lonely, pointless.  Sighing, I almost don't notice the dark figure roaming
around below.  Almost.  I admit, the first time I see you I become very
defensive.  I draw my sword and get ready to charge down the stairs to
attack you.  That is, until you push the hood of the black cloak off your
head, revealing your face.  I suck in my breath sharply.  From behind a
large column on the second floor, I watch you, hypnotized.  
Maybe it's the way the silver moonbeams make your unusual hair glimmer like
gold.  Or the delicate shadows they cast upon your face.  Or the way you
move, that couldn't have been earthly, more like a fairy or an angel.  But,
most probably, I feel like, suddenly, I'm not the only insomniac dreamer.
That someone else on this earth enjoys the quiet of a moonlit garden.  That
someone else isn't afraid to defy the "rules" set for us by an unforgiving
society.  I can't explain it, but suddenly I am rooted to the floor.  My
mouth goes dry, my palms get sweaty, and I feel queasy.  All I can do is
stare, enraptured.
I can't say just how long I stay here but I snap back to reality when you
look around sharply and proceed to leave.  I know I should run to you and
at ask your name, where you're from, why you're here, something, anything,
but I don't.  I will never know why.  One half might be the belief you will
return.  The other half, the more insightful side, senses it was possibly
the hands of the Fates holding me back, making one last desperate effort to
prevent me from sinking into an unknown realm.   One foreboding, ominous
plea.  One melodious, sweet-sounding song.
How I get down the marble steps and into the garden I will never know.
Somehow, I just find myself there.  Almost mechanically, I roam around,
pausing at the red roses, my favorite flower, as I always do.  But I don't
enjoy it as much.  My senses have been numbed; tonight doesn't seem real,
did this actually happen?  Are you just a fancy of a weary mind?  An escape
from the routine of life?  Are the Gods playing a cruel trick on me?  I
shake my head a bit, then smile with the satisfaction of what only I know
to be true. I think I would die if I woke up only to realize that this had
been all a dream and that you only existed in my head.  Because, while
dreams are exquisite, oftentimes reality is much nicer.
                         **********
Since that one precious moment that I first laid eyes upon you, I have gone
every night to idolize and adore you secretly. 
Tonight, I creep silently out of my room as usual.  My heart is beating
faster than normal.  I hope, wish, pray that you will be there so that I
can worship you again.  You have become more than just a pretty face to me.
In you exists a gentleness that I have seen from no one else.  I can see
two different demeanors in you.  Sometimes, you are the little girl,
wonderously and curiously examining the flowers or skipping from bush to
bush to greet your blooming companions.  And other times, you act like a
graceful, wise woman, running your fingers delicately over the roses or
gazing pensively at the moon for minutes at a time.  Each personality awes
me more than the next.
I swallow the huge lump in my throat and proceed to the same place as the
preceeding nights and peek around the huge cloumn, a spy in my own
territory.   The garden is empty; you are not awaiting me.  Hva e you
deserted me?  The dissapointment I experience shocks and scares me.  A
million "if only's" race through my head.  If only I had introduced myself
sooner.  If only I hadn't acted like an immature worm.  If only I had a
backbone...maybe you'd be here now.  I realize I'm panicking.  But, you've
illuminated my life like a raging fire for the short time I've "known" you.
I've never thought of the possibility of the flame dying...
But, them, I hear a rustling in the trees.  Looking closer, I see a figure.
Could it be you?  Up in a tree?  I squint hard and see the platinum tresses
around your sweet face and know it is. My heart soars and then I laugh.
You, up in that tree!  Climbing it!  It is absolutely unheard of for
someone of our ages, much less a girl, to be climbing trees.  How
refreshing!  I have this childish, silly grin on my face, I know it.  I
can't stop it either. I'm so relieved.  When I see you, it's like a-"Ahem."
I freeze when I hear someone behind me clearing their throat.  Painfully,
slowly, I turn around only to be staring into the questioning face of my
best friend, Kunzite."Exactly what-" he begins noisily.
"Shhh.  Not so loud,"  I say putting my hand over his mouth.
He pushes it away and in a sharp whisper begins to scold me.  "Are you
insane, Endymion?  Why are you out here hiding like an intruder at this
time of night?  What are you doing?!"  
I smile again.  "Look for yourself,"  I whisper gesturing out to thegarden.
Kunzite glances briefly into the foliage and then looks back at me.  "So?
It's your crazy garden, same as always."
I take his chin and point his gaze in the direction of the trees.  "Look up
there.  In the branches."
Squinting, just as I did, he examines it and then gasps.  "There's somebody
up there!  Come on!"
He draws his sword and is about to charge when I grasp his shoulder tightly
and stop him.  He gives me a startled, puzzled look as if I've just taken
my dagger and thrusted it into his back.
"Endymion, what's come over you?  There is a tresspasser on the grounds!
Usually, you'd be the first person to escort them to prison!  What's wrong
with you?"I chuckle.  "Kunzite, my dear, dear friend, you're so naive.  That
'intruder' you speak of is more of an angel, a fairy, a spirit sent from-"
He rolls his eyes. "Alright, I get the point, you seem to have taken a
liking to this mythological creature.  But, why is she up in a tree? Is she
any good-looking?  When did you meet her? What's her name?"
"Because she's marvelously different and free.  Yes, incredibly beautiful.
We've never met.  And I don't know." I respond, answering all fourquestions.
"Excuse me?  You've never met her?  You're out here at this god-awful hour
for some girl you've never even spoken to?  Endymion, you have gone crazy!"
"How right you are, my friend.  Crazy for her!  I can't stop thinking about
her.  Our meeting is written in the stars, I just don't know how to go
about it..."  Something in my tone becomes wistful, almost melancholy.  I
continue, in a whisper,  "I think she'd reject me.  I don't know what todo."
There is silence.  I didn't know I could feel this way: dejected, hopeless,
depressed.  I know if I could talk to her, she would flutter away like a
careless butterfly, or worse yet, be real and laugh in my face.  Why would
I want a stuffy, old prince like you? she'd say.  I sigh.  Is this how it
is to be in-?  
"Your birthday celebration is in less than two weeks right?" Kunzite asks,
breaking the silence."Don't remind me," I say pathetically.
"Well, why not 'accidentaly' leave an invitation in the garden, you know,
crumple it a little, as if someone dropped it, make it look unintentional.
If she finds it and comes, at least you can introduce yourself properly,
like a sane prince would."
The word "sane" is uttered sarcastically.  It's not a bad idea, though.  I
smile and punch my friend lightly on the arm.
"Great idea, pal.  Took the words right out of my mouth."
He turns and walks away.  "Yeah, sure.  Good night, Prince."
                            *******
My heart beats a mile a minute and I have that queasy feeling once more.  I
observe as you stumble across the slightly crumpled and carelessly
"forgotten" invitation in the garden and proceed to read it.  I think I
would trade a year of my life just to be that paper, your hands touching it
gently and folding it with delicate care.   
I watch as you silently slip away and smile to myself.  I say an inner
prayer to the starry heavens that you grace me with your presence thatnight.
                           *********
The evening I have been dreading, yet awaiting, for quite a while.  I
absolutely detest these royal parties; they're too formal.  The room looks
absolutely marvelous, however, bright lights and a new polished crystal
chandelier illuminate it,  all kinds of food is being offered by servants,
and more beautiful girls than I have ever seen before in my life chat and
giggle together.  Despite all this, though, I can't help feeling anxious
and a bit downcast.  There must be at least one hundred gorgeous maidens
here, with their lavish hairstyles and overdone dresses, but the only one
who I want to be here isn't.  I knew you'd be too good for this.
Reluctantly, I force a plastic smile and mingle.  
Talking with a few insipid princesses that have peas for brains, my eyes
suddenly meet with a certain redhead's across the room.  Smiling, she waves
and proceeds to where I am.  I have mixed feelings about this.  After all,
she'll save me from this dreadfully boring conversation with these girls,
but then I'll probably have to begin another tiring chat with her.  Still
walking, she holds out her hands to me."Dance with me?" she implores.  
Seeing the hope in her eyes makes what I do next cause me to feel likedirt.  
"Uh, well, Beryl, you see, uh, I, uh, don't feel so good so I sort of have
to go.  Maybe some other time."
I turn quickly and stride off to a corner.  I can't bear to look back to
see the reaction.  I sigh.  Love, as I am discovering, can be one of the
most painful,  yet beautiful emotions. Suddenly, I feel a slap on my back.
"Lots of great girls here tonight, eh, Prince?"
I turn around and stare at the grinning faces of my friends Kunzite,
Jadeite, Zoicite*, and Nephrite, the one who just spoke.  I attempt a
smile.  No luck."Whatever," I mumble.
"Why so blue, Endymion?" Jadeite asks. "You shouldn't be depressed!  It's
your birthday!  You're at a party!  Cheer up!"
Nephrite nods and grins slyly.  "Yeah, and look at all these women!  I've
danced with five already!  And there's only been four songs!"
The three other Generals laugh and elbow him encouragingly.  I smile in
spite of myself and then scan the room, holding on to some hope that maybe
you'll appear.
"Who are you looking for, Prince?" teases Zoicite. "Is it, perhaps,
Princess Beryl?"
All four laugh again.  They know very well my feelings for Beryl are less
than loving.  I shove Zoicite playfully.  
"Get out of here and go dance, you old bag!" I say.
He laughs and pats my shoulder.  "Only if you cheer up.  You take things
too seriously, that's your problem.  Come on, boys, lets go catch us some
ladies!"
Zoicite, Nephrite, and Jadeite walk away.  I am left standing with Kunzite.
We are both silent.  "If she isn't here yet, Endymion, then-"
"She'll come.  I know she will!" I protest.  You wouldn't abandon me like
that, would you?He sighs and shakes his head.  "You've got it bad."
"What?" I ask."You know perfectly well what I'm talking about."
And I do.  I swallow hard and run my fingers through my hair.
"What should I do, Kunzite?"
"You're desperate.  Go out to the Garden whenever you know she'll be there.
If she's there, introduce yourself and invite her up."
"She'll laugh.  She's not like other girls; she's different."
Now Kunzite laughs.  "How do you know?  You've never even spoken to her.
Listen, if you're this gone on her, just ask.  You never know what could
happen.  And, besides, you'll never forgive yourself if you don't."
I sigh and think about this.  He does have a point, like always.
"Alright," I say.  "What time is it?"
Kunzite looks at the clock across the room.  "11:57."
"Oh, shoot!" I say.  I turn and without saying goodbye, run out to the
garden to meet you again for the first time.                            ******
I hear the clock sound once.  12:30.  Have I really been out here for
half-an-hour?  I sigh and am choked up.  You're not coming.  I knew it.  I
guess we really weren't meant to be.  I fight to hold back tears; crying is
ridiculous, right?  Slowly, I make my way back to the ballroom.  I can't
bear the the thought of walking back in there to all of the frilly,
extravagant young women who aren't you.  I trudge my way upstairs; my focus
downcast the entire time.  I am no more than a hundred yards away from the
entrance to the ballroom.
Suddenly, someone crashes into me.  I'm in no mood for clumsy, tripping
idiots, but don't have the strenght to do anything about it.
Mumbling an apology, I quickly look up.
The words die on my tongue as I look into a face I never thought I would
see up close.  Dumfounded, my jaw drops, my eyes are as wide as saucers,
and I stare.  Can it be?  I stare into the bluest eyes I've ever seen.  The
simple white dress you are wearing revealing your delicate, smooth
shoulders and neck looks a thousand times better on you than the lacy,
frilly ones of the other girls.  Your golden hair sparkles like a heavenly
waterfall.  Your lips and your cheeks are like the roses in my garden.   I
have never ever seen beauty like this in my life.  It's as if you were
glowing.  The surprised expression on your face mirrors mine.  Finally, I
come to my senses."It's you," we both whisper at the exact same time.
To be continued...
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Author's notes*Yes, in the manga Zoicite is a heterosexual male.
Stay tuned for Act 3 of my wonderous fic...friends Kunzite, Jadeite,
Zoicite*, and Nephrite, the one who just spoke.  I a€?
"Alright," I say.  "What time is it?"Kunzite looks at the clock