You know you're stressed if....
-Relatives that have been dead for years come visit you and
suggest that you should get some rest
- You can achieve a "runner's high" by sitting up
- You say the same sentence over and over again, not
realizing that you have said it before
- The sun is too loud
- Trees begin chasing you
- You can see individual air molecules vibrating
- You begin to explore the possibility of setting up an IV
drip solution of espresso.
- You wonder if brewing is really a necessary step for the
consumption of coffee
- You can hear mimes
- You believe that if you think hard enough, you can fly
- Things suddenly become "Very Clear"
- You ask the drive-thru attendant if you can get your order to go
- The less sense matter and matter is more than sense . . .
- You begin speaking in a language that only you and
Channelers can understand
- You say the same sentence over and over again, not
realizing that you have said it before
- You keep yelling, "STOP TOUCHING ME!!!" even though you are
the only one in the room
- Your heart beats in 7/8 time
- David Lynch comes up to you and says: "Hey! can I film you?"
- You and Reality file for a divorce
- You can skip without a rope
- It appears that people are speaking to you in binary code
- You have a great revelation concerning Life, the Universe,
and Everything else, but can't quite find the words for them
before the white glow disappears, leaving you more confused
than before
- You can travel without moving
- Antacid tablets become your sole source of nutrition
- You discover the aesthetic beauty of office supplies
- You begin to talk to yourself, then disagree about the
subject, get into a nasty row over it, lose, and refuse to
speak to yourself for the rest of the night
- Teddy bears begin to bully you for milk and cookies
- You have an irresistible urge to bite the noses of the
people you are talking to
- You say the same sentence over and over again, not
realizing that you have said it before
- You find it utterly hilarious when a tragedy happens,
particularly when it happens to you
- Your bathroom breaks become occasions for hour-long naps
- You feel a twinge of guilt whenever you walk past your bed
- The Man in the Moon makes faces at you
- Hari Kari becomes a viable option
- You go around kicking trees because they have the *@$^*%!
luck to have photosynthesis
- You do not find it surprising when trees change color by
the minute
- You do not find it surprising when people change color by
the minute
- You starting asking around for a judge to whom you can
appeal the Law of Gravity
- You hold your arms straight up in the air for hours on end
so that at least some part of your body will be "asleep"
- You say the same sentence over and over again, not
realizing that you have said it before . . .